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Monday, November 14, 2011

Monday Musings: A rant--don't engage the crazy

I normally try to look at the bright side of things.  I'm not an optimistic person by nature, but I usually try very hard to look at the glass as half-full.  The "there's always a reason for everything" thing.  And I usually succeed. It may take me a minute or ten, but I eventually figure it out and go on my happy way, but this time I can't. I'm pissed.  Yeah, I said it. I usually don't like swearing on my blogs and really that's not all that bad,'s the only word that I think really describes exactly how I feel at this minute.

I know by holding onto the anger I'm only making things worse. I know by being angry still I'm letting her "win," but damn it, it bugs me. Well, obviously, it does more than bug me.

And now you're going "well, what the hell is it all ready?"  It's road rage, people.  Don't give in to it.  Seriously. It's dumb. It's stupid. And it causes you to do idiotic things.  Why am I talking about it? Because of an incident that happened on Saturday to me.

I was driving behind my husband (who finally got his motorcycle back after his accident) and we needed to meet my MIL at her work to pick up my daughter.  So, I'm following behind him, keeping an eye on him and the bike and everything else, and we merge into the exit lane off the highway.

Now this particular exit can be fairly tricky to manuever, but I've done it a thousand times.  I flick on my blinker, glance behind me and check all my mirrors (seriously, if you don't do all that, you'll hit someone, it's ridiculous how horrible this exit is.)  and see I have room to merge over. 

The minute I do, the lady I merged in front of gets pissed (for what reason I have no idea because there was more than a car length between us) she flashes her lights and blares her horn.

Me? I ignore it. Although I'll admit I was a little frustrated.  I mean, really?  Was all that necessary?  But that wasn't even the worst of it. This is where the road rage comes in.  She decides that since I've ignored her, obviously she needs to get my attention. She roars up around me and then pulls up next to me --in my lane! --And proceeds to yell at me through her open window and my closed one.

My heart is seriously pumping some blood now and I'm a bit shaky (because I HATE confrontations. Seriously hate them.), but I ignore her, figuring she'll just go away when the light turns green.  She didn't.  In fact, she follows me THISCLOSE to my back bumper until the next light, in which she speeds up to get in front of me and then SLAMS ON HER BRAKES, so I have to slam on mine in order to avoid hitting her.

Then she flings open her door and continues to YELL AT ME again through my closed windows. I honestly have no friggin clue what she was saying.  Of course, now I'm pissed.  She almost made me HIT HER!  WTH?!  So I flick her off (not my brightest idea) and stick out my tongue at her.

This, of course, only makes her more angry and she slams back into her car and THROWS IT IN REVERSE!  Uh, yeah, I had to do the same, so I decide to just pull into the second turn lane next to me. To get away from Psycho bitch, as I've now dubbed her in my head.

Of course, she gets in front of me again, but this time blocks BOTH turn lanes.  This is the point that I SHOULD have called the police.  I should have just stayed there and waited for them to come and arrest her, but I was worried about my husband and I didn't know where my MIL worked, (also, I was a little scared at this point. I didn't want to be alone with this woman and for some reason this side street was practically empty--probably because it's a business complex and it was Saturday, but anyway, I digress)  So, I speed around her and try to catch up with my husband who is blissfully unaware any of this is happening.

She continues to follow me, all the way into the parking lot where my husband and MIL are.  She speeds around me and blocks all of our vehicles in, then opens her window and starts screaming again.

At this point I've had enough, so I get out of the car and storm to the halfway point between our cars (which happened to be next to my husband) and I say, "WTF is your problem?!" I think I may have called her a bitch, too.

She starts screaming that I cut her off and almost killed her three babies in the back seat.

At this point I'm completely dumbfounded. 1) there was plenty of room and we weren't even going more than 10 MPH 2) SHE did much more harm to those kids by pulling her stupid stunts than I ever did, even if I'd done what she thought I did, and 3) she's spitting and cursing and screaming like a mad woman while her kids are in the car?  How is THAT not damaging to them? 

Then  she really pisses me off by calling me a fat ass.  Okay, I know I'm fat. I get it.  It's a little impossible not to realize this fact when I put on my jeans every morning, but really, you followed me all the way from the highway to my MILs job, cutting me off and driving like a lunatic to call me a fat ass?  Really?

But, at this point I don't much care, so I spout off some not nice things.  Something along the lines of calling her a whore and whatnot.  Then she tells me I couldn't even get laid if I wanted to.  Obviously the hot man next to me, with his arm around me didn't make it clear that that's not a problem, but I scream out that at least I know how to close my legs.  Mature, right?!  *eye roll*

Yeah, not my most shining moment, I know.  After a few more moments of her screaming at me and me now ignoring it because my husband is smarter than me and tells me to "shut up. You're only making it worse", she leaves.

I have to sit down because now I'm sick to my stomach and shaking so hard I can't stand.  Then I start to think, because obviously my brain stopped working a while ago.  That she was really dumb.  And I don't mean just the road rage.

She had NO IDEA who was driving my big ass truck with tinted windows.  It could have been anyone.  I could have had a gun. I could have been a rapist for crying out loud. It's not like we were in an area that had a lot of people.

Here she is, so pissed because she thought I did her wrong (and in her eyes maybe I did get too close. According to me and the law--which I looked up afterward--I didn't, but who knows what she thought), she was willing to risk not only her life, but that of her three kids.

Something tells me she wasn't all that worried about those kids and it was just an excuse, but really?  And yeah, now I'm mad all over again. Not because of what she did to me--which was dumb--but because of what she did to her kids!  And that, in my mind, borders on abuse or neglect or something.  She didn't once think of those kids when she was doing all that.  Otherwise she wouldn't have done it!

But that's not even the end, she waited until we all left the parking lot.  My MIL decided that it would be better to take my DD home in her car, in case crazy lady hadn't given up. SHe felt it would be safer.

I agreed, which is a good thing I did, because she--crazy lady-- of course did wait for me.  But she went after my husband instead.  Remember he's on a motorcycle.  So I'm freaking out she's going to get him killed.  So I try getting her attention so she'll follow me again and try going a different way home.

But she doesn't follow me, she only continues to follow DH.  My MIL (obviously smarter than I, calls 9-1-1 and reports her) and I'm panicked the whole way home something happened to him, but he's home when I get there and gives me this HUGE hug, which makes me burst into tears (because I LITERALLY cry over EVERYTHING).

She apparently decided he wasn't worth it and left him alone after a mile or two.  Maybe she came back to her senses?  Maybe she realized we called 9-1-1. I don't know.  I guess it doesn't matter. 

But, yeah, I'm still pissed, and yeah, it's a bit about what she did to me, but it's mostly because of her kids.  I sincerely hope this was a one shot deal and it'll never happen again, but I'm seriously concerned for those kids, because next time she does that, she may not be so lucky.

Of course, I feel pretty stupid, too. I should never have "engaged the crazy."  I should have continued to ignore her.  I should've called 9-1-1 in the beginning. In fact, there are many things I should have done, but didn't.  And that's just another reason we should learn to curb our anger, because it makes us temporarily stupid.